Five Things Women (and Everyone Else) Want in the Workplace And How to Provide Them

by Jane Sanders

Too bad we can’t have Mel Gibson’s ability in his movie “What Women Want” to hear what women are really thinking! My research provides the next best thing…what over 100 professional women in various industries and positions told me they were thinking. Following are a few of their insights with a couple suggestions (out of many options) for each.

As you read, notice how these desires/demands parallel those expressed by Gen Y! As I’ve always said, by addressing women’s issues, you address the needs of all workers (it’s just that women and Gen Y are generally more vocal about these needs) and your recruiting and retention results will improve accordingly.

 #1: Of no surprise, women want and are demanding flexibility. Even with men contributing more at home, women still handle the majority of child-rearing and home-making duties. The incoming Millennial Generation (Gen Y) is adding to this growing workplace requirement of flexibility for both men and women.

Combine this workload with the increasing desire to spend more time with family and to maintain some semblance of balance between work and personal lives, and flexibility becomes paramount. The workaholic phenomenon is over.

Suggestions: Form a task force to address this need. Let flexibility take many forms and options, such as flex time, part-time, extended days with Friday off, tele-commuting, individual schedule control, etc. Then while recruiting promote these important benefits. Happy, less-stressed employees are more productive employees - few HR leaders would argue about that. Every study I have read indicates that flexibility and performance measured by results, not by face time, improve productivity.

#2: Women want fulfillment from helping people in a meaningful way. They want to make a positive difference in their community, in their company, in the world. Generally, women are nurturers and want to help others and make things better for people. And Gen Y is committed to altruism, volunteerism, the green movement, and making the world a better place.

Suggestions: Certainly while recruiting, and continuing with regularity, communicate clearly and specifically how your company helps people and makes a difference in the world. Make the connection between what employees do every day to positively change lives, and talk about it internally and externally. Initiate a “The Good We Do” bulletin board, email newsletter, or segment of your staff meetings and other events.

#3: Women want to work where they are cared about and supported. Not mothered, but supported and cared for as an integral member of a community. Does your office feel like a community, a family of sorts? Even increasing your encouraging comments and acknowledgements can make a big difference. Do your employees have access to the training and coaching they feel they need?

Suggestions: For a simple example, as manager, do you acknowledge their birthdays? On a grander and critically important scale, does upper management talk-the-talk and walk-the-walk of a company that is serious about supporting women? Are they genuine? Women, whether they realize it or not, are very intuitive about genuineness and can see through lip service. Gen Y’ers don’t trust executives to begin with and do not have the innate loyalty to authority that older generations have.

Taking this series of questioning a bit deeper, does the executive team even know how to talk to and about women in an inclusive, respectful, sincere manner? Do they offer a meaningful and effective mentoring program for all employees?

#4: Women want to work for ethical companies that demonstrate social responsibility and walk their talk. In order to trust and perform at their best, women need to see that words are followed by action, that action reflects promises and rhetoric, and that their company is highly reputable and admired.

Suggestions: Is your company involved in charitable organizations? Putting a team together for charity events addresses these last two needs – for community and company pride. Again, does upper management only talk increasing sustainability? Are they walking their talk and actually doing something about it? Something that matters and gets good visibility? Does the company truly promote and recommend what’s best for customers first, then for their profit margin? Do their actions, internally and externally, reflect their posted values?

#5: Women want to be taken seriously. They want to be trusted and respected, and they want to be able to trust and respect their leaders and managers. Of all the needs discussed to this point, this one requires the most effective communication and understanding of gender style differences.

Suggestions: Let’s (notice my inclusive language style) explore a few strategies and tactics to help develop respect and trust with women. Trust must exist for women to feel a connection and perform at their highest level. Below are four key strategies, with accompanying tips for each, that can be applied while recruiting and while managing women and Gen Y:

1. Accommodate her communication style and need for connection

   • Ask about her challenges, successes, hobbies, kids (if she already mentioned them), interests, etc., of course within your company’s legal parameters.
   • Offer your own personal information as appropriate.
   • Be interested in and empathetic with her problems and challenges but don’t try to solve them (unless they are performance related and she clearly needs support).
   • Offer verbal emotional support.
   • Be polite, use “please” and “thank you.”
   • Don’t use patronizing remarks such as “honey,” “sweetie,” “gal,” “feminine problems,” etc. (As you roll your eyes saying “no kidding,” don’t delude yourself that this isn’t happening.)
   • Ask for her input and opinions about work/office issues so she feels valued and respected.
   • Offer more details.
   • Understand her need to process thoughts and feelings out loud.
   • Recognize she may not sell herself to you as well as she could sell your products and services.
   • Know that a softer style (inclusive language, apologies, etc.) doesn’t necessarily mean less competent or talented. Also recognize that she may not sell herself to you during a recruiting interview as well as she could sell your products & services after being hired.

2. Listen to her attentively

   • Maintain direct but not constant eye contact.
   • Re-phrase and repeat her comments occasionally.
   • Watch her body language and facial expressions for signs of confusion or disagreement.
   • Interrupt rarely, primarily only to clarify.

3. Acknowledge her stress

   • Show willingness to discuss: “Having a crazy day? Tell me what’s going on.”
   • Empathize and share similar stories.
   • Sincerely acknowledge her ability to manage life, family, and career.
   • Listen; don’t give solutions; then ask if you can help.

4. Honor her decision-making style

   • Offer more detail.
   • Avoid pressure or rushing her decision.
   • Share similar examples of other women who joined your company.
   • Let her talk alone with other women leaders and managers.
     

The Bottom Line - Two Critical Needs

Women desire security – the second critical need - physical first, of course, but even more so in modern times, emotional security. Relationship and connection give them this security. The more your company and management take into account gender communication style differences, the more they will be able to create and maintain the connection, security, and relationship women want at their deepest cellular core.

If women feel respected, supported, part of a group, treated equally, and that they are truly making a positive difference in the world…they will join your company and they will stay.

Jane Sanders, president of GenderSmart Solutions, is one of the country’s leading experts on gender issues and communication. She is a consultant, speaker, and trainer in the areas of gender communication, recruiting & retention of women, leadership confidence for women, and strategic life planning. Jane has over 17 years of sales and marketing experience in the corporate world and founded her own successful firm over 15 years ago. She is author of “GenderSmart®: Solving The Communication Puzzle Between Men and Women.” Jane is proud to include among her clients MassMutual, Prudential Financial, Ameriprise Financial, Deloitte & Touche, US Steel, Nestlé Foods, Toyota Motor Sales, and many other companies and associations in many different industries. She can be reached toll-free at 877-343-2150, or at jane@janesanders.com.

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