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GET GENDERSMART®: BEWARE OF STEREOTYPES!
by Jane Sanders
Every one of us, to a certain extent, believes some of the old gender
stereotypes. Regardless of the significant progress in diversity issues being
made throughout the workforce, stereotypes of some sort will always exist.
Unfortunately, difficulties occur when stereotypes are used, however
subconsciously, to prejudge people’s abilities and competence and develop unfair
and incorrect expectations. When that happens, effective communication, along
with productive relationships and advancement opportunities, are jeopardized and
thwarted.
When a staff member expresses frustration by crying in the office, shows a
sensitive side by nurturing an upset colleague, or asks a question about a
project, do observers quietly doubt her competence on the job? If a new director
brought homemade cookies to the office, would others question her management and
decision-making skills? Would some people wonder, at some level, if an
outspoken, driven, aggressive sales director were a good and loving father to
his two young children?
Try This Exercise
The following simple yet meaningful exercise will help demonstrate the affect
of seemingly innocent stereotypes on judgments of others. Very quickly, using
your first impression, indicate beside each adjective below which gender the
word best describes. Use “M” for Male, “F” for Female, and “B” for Both, but
only if the word immediately brings to mind both men and women. Be honest and
record the very first response that pops into your mind.
Descriptive Adjectives
Entrepreneur ___
Scuba diver ___
Critical ___
Hiker ___
Funny ___
Cheerful ___
Likes children ___
Intelligent ___
Good cook ___
Romantic ___
Fussy ___
Horseback rider ___
Impetuous ___
Persistent ___
Assertive ___
Intense ___
Nurturing ___
Committed ___
Talkative ___
Logical ___
Intuitive ___ |
Gentle ___
Warm ___
Likes flowers ___
Self-starter ___
Emotional ___
Competitive ___
Football fan ___
Courageous ___
Powerful ___
Impatient ___
Too sensitive ___
Hates spiders ___
Competent ___
Daring ___
Dynamic ___
Loving ___
Independent ___
Competent ___
Outspoken ___
Compassionate ___
Driven ___ |
Notice the number of M’s, F’s, and B’s. you recorded. Most people get a good
mix of all three. Looking at the list of adjectives, is there any one word that
could not describe either gender? If not, then all the M’s and F’s you recorded
indicate subtle and subconscious (and sometimes not so subconscious)
stereotypical beliefs.
Keep in mind that simply believing that some of these descriptions are
gender-based is not wrong, nor a “bad” thing to do. Stereotypes, particularly
those related to gender, often develop from observed behavioral generalities.
Problems occur when stereotypes are used,
however subconsciously, to prejudge
people’s abilities and competence and
develop unfair and incorrect expectations.
For example, probably most of those completing this exercise indicated Female
for the descriptions of emotional and nurturing and Male for the words
aggressive and football fan. Speaking in general terms, are women usually more
emotional than men, at least from what others can see? Of course. Are men
usually more aggressive than women? Yes. The stereotypes in a vacuum are not the
problem. However, if stereotypes are used to form opinions about other elements
of a person’s capabilities or behavior, then problems arise. Doing so is not
only unfair...it is judgmental and assumptive.
What’s The Point?
Notice how many adjectives you checked that generally apply to your gender.
We apply stereotypes to ourselves too! The key point demonstrated by this
exercise is… just because a woman may be emotional, “too” sensitive (meaning
more sensitive than the person judging her behavior…notice how the word “too”
automatically implies judgment and wrongness?) in certain situations, nurturing,
and a good cook, does not preclude her from also being decisive, competent,
intelligent, and driven. And just because a man might be decisive, intense,
logical, and independent does not mean that he is not also nurturing, sensitive,
gentle, and a good cook.
An employee may express emotion differently than her manager does, and that’s
fine. Her emotion does not necessarily translate to poor management abilities.
The sales director certainly seems like a focused, driven, aggressive man. But
chances are that he turns those hard-charging sales qualities off when he goes
home to be with his children.
Stereotypes Are Just That
Stereotypes are neither reliable job performance indicators nor accurate
descriptors of someone’s complete personality. So, before responding to
another’s “stereotypical” behavior or comments, evaluate the clues available.
Searching for the whole picture will enhance communication and result in a more
objective, meaningful, and productive outcome.
© 2008, Jane Sanders, all rights reserved
Jane Sanders is a speaker, trainer, and facilitator in the areas of authentic
leadership confidence, recruiting & retention of women, strategic life planning,
gender communication, presentation skills, and communicating with difficult
people. She is author of “GenderSmart: Solving The Communication Puzzle Between
Men and Women,” available on her website and on amazon.com. Reach Jane toll-free
at 877-343-2150; jane@janesanders.com;
www.janesanders.com.
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